Sunday, March 23, 2014

Forgiveness

And is very personal. Very.

ignorance- 1. lack of knowledge or information.
"he acted in ignorance of basic procedures"
synonyms: incomprehension of, unawareness of, unconsciousness of, unfamiliarity with, inexperience with, lack of knowledge about, lack of information about;
lack of knowledge, lack of education, unenlightenment, illiteracy;
lack of intelligence, stupidity, foolishness, idiocy

Sometimes, this is the perspective people speak from... it's not their fault, they just lack knowledge to make a legitimate and informed opinion. And then they voice it. In a public manner. And here's the kicker. I have to forgive them. Especially if it was said in a manner I was not privy to. Jesus calls us to forgive. Because it's not about them, and their opinion, and what they think that He is trying to develop in me.

God is trying to form a better person in me, a better, more Christlike Character.

In my reaction.

In my response.

In my heart.

Our family journey has never been the easy road. There are times when the very decisions we make are life altering. They are life and death. That is as real as it gets. My children, and their disabilities, are real. Our decisions have real consequences. When we set out to make decisions, we do it with counsel. We pray fervently, and seek God's face. Counsel comes from medical professionals, from our pastor, from our families, from the people that are close to us and desire the very best versions of us, and want what is is in the best interest of our family.

Disability is a completely different world. It is very easy to arm chair quarterback parents, who sometimes have to make moment to moment decisions, or who spend hours and hours of research and time with doctors making decisions about long term problems.

Ultimately, every medication, every surgery, every procedure, every piece of equipment, every decision, is a step.

A step in faith.

Giving our children back to God.

Asking for His protection.

His guidance.

His blessing.

His intervention.

Begging Him to pour Himself into our lives, with assurance, and love, and direction.

It's all in faith.

And when things happen the way God wants them, the blessings flow. Things just fall into place. Procedures that were supposed to be 6 hours suddenly become 4 hours long. Bones that were once twisted on x-rays "fall into place" miraculously. You no longer need body casts, because "the x-ray was totally different than the situation once we opened up his legs."

I speak experience, because these things have happened to me.

Coming full circle, I will say this. Every parent that reads this can say there has been a time in their life when someone has told them that they don't agree with a decision that you are making with your child. It's their opinion, and one probably made out of ignorance, dear mother. Ignorance is not a negative thing. It is a lack of. Simple.

So, as I sort through my emotions, and come to full grips with it- I must forgive.

Easy? No.

Necessary? Yes.

Because Jesus died for me, as an atonement for my sins.

Did I deserve an amazing gift like this? No.

Was it an easy task for him? No.

Am I supposed to forgive as I have been forgiven? Yes.

My daughter reminded me of a saying today- Words are like toothpaste- once they come out of the tube, there is no putting them back in. If you are someone who tends to form opinions on matters that you know nothing about- remember that those things hurt, and you can't take them back. If you are a momma who has been deeply hurt for your child, or on behalf of a decision you made for your child.
Forgive. Don't let it eat away at you.

It's not worth it.
I promise.